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User talk:AWrinklyFod
Welcome Hi, welcome to Creepypasta Wiki! Thanks for your edit to the Scratching in the Wall page. Please be sure to check out all the Site Rules, as it is important to follow them. Failure to abide by them may result in your account being blocked. Read some new pastas by checking out or browse by topic by checking out the Genre Listing. Please leave a message on my talk page if I can help with anything! WhyAmIReadingThis (talk) 16:53, December 9, 2015 (UTC) EmpyrealInvective (talk) 17:23, December 9, 2015 (UTC) Re: Story Your story was deleted for not being up to quality standards. Punctuation issues: apostrophes missing from words denoting possession. "Authors words", "his room to grandmothers", "my grandmothers room", etc. Periods missing from the end of sentences: "myself(.) At the end of my birthday" Wording issues: Run-on sentences. "In her will she gave my mother the house, in which my mother grew up in, we took house out of respect, my room was next to her room, my room was only small, and I was young, so they figured I wouldn’t need much space.", "We got cosy in the house after a while passed, we cleared her room, but it wasn’t clear for long, as it became more of a storage room, we would typically put things in there of no use for the time being, I don’t quite recall what we did with all of the furniture in there in the first place, but I know that things would break in there, so glass would be sitting on the floor.", "When I turned eleven, I would go in there to look for things, I called it scavenging, my parents didn’t want me going in there, so I would typically sneak in there to find things, and I did find a lot of things, but they were half broken, or were useless to me, the only ever thing I found that was useful was a ruler, with a protractor engraved into it.", etc. Wording issues: cont.: You have a number of redundancy issues here. "I ran to my grandmother’s room door, kicked it open, as I did, everything was silent, not a single sound, I looked to the wall connecting my room to grandmothers," You really don't need to repeat the word grandmother multiple times after establishing it earlier in the sentence. Story issues: Starting with the opening: "It was early summer, and I was only eight years old and my name is George, my grandmother died of lung cancer." is not a very good opening. The character's introduction feels like it should be broken in two parts as it ties two events that have no impact on each other. ("my name is George, my grandmother died of lung cancer.") This story has a lot of proof-reading issues that make it seem like you wrote it in one sitting and didn't read it over: "I paid him and (sic) extra ten pound to not kill the mouse". Also the ending "an old woman in an old white dress, looking at me, with deep, dark eyes." feels extremely anti-climactic. (So much so, that I thought for a bit you forgot to complete the story and uploaded an unfinished version.) There needs to be more here. You really need to flesh out your descriptions and build up your character. There are quite a lot of issues, but those were the one I noticed while reading it. As for reuploading it, you need to do a deletion appeal, but your story needs drastic re-working before then. EmpyrealInvective (talk) 17:50, December 9, 2015 (UTC)